Feeling like a woman again.

[wocky]

Oh sweetie, what a bittersweet story. I'm so, so sorry about your miscarriage. I can't even imagine how grief-stricken you were. And the changes to your body afterwards must have been the final straw. I'm really glad that this surgery helped to restore your self-esteem and confidence, that is SO important to moving forward. And honey, you look HOT! We had our surgeries on the same day but I look nowhere as awesome as you! (with my little 200cc's I still look, well, about the same as I did pre-op!) Rest up and I wish you a speedy recovery. HUGS!

[wocky]

Oh, and by the way, I still haven't had number 2 either! I started taking Miralax yesterday and have been drinking tons of water. My nurse also recommended pear nectar juice as a tastier alternative to prune juice, which I loathe! I'm soooo dreading my first BM since I also had a FTT...my abs hurt like the dickens right now!

[MMLynn]

Thank you! That's exactly how I felt afterwards.

I'm sure you look great. To each their own, right?

I hope something happens for you soon. My stomach is about to explode. I bought a last resort if nothing happens by tomorrow but right now I'm taking stool softners and water.

[twins4me]

Just read your story. Amazing. I hope you will find fullness in all of your life... and that your happiness now radiates out!!!

Thank you for sharing your story. I went through 3 years of infertility, and while I've never lost a baby (the grief of which I could NEVER imagine), I know somewhat of the emptiness that you talk about.

I wish you the absolute best - continued quick healing both physically and emotionally.

And again, you look AMAZING in your pics. Simply AMAZING.

Sherri

[*starkarros*]

CONGRATZ again on you NEW BIG boobies ~ woo hoo ~ you look STUNNING ALREADY ~ I hope you "BM" comes very soon ... I know how much that can hurt ~ but girl, you truly look great so early on...just wait..it gets better and better and BETTER hehe

[MMLynn]

Originally Posted by *starkarros*

CONGRATZ again on you NEW BIG boobies ~ woo hoo ~ you look STUNNING ALREADY ~ I hope you "BM" comes very soon ... I know how much that can hurt ~ but girl, you truly look great so early on...just wait..it gets better and better and BETTER hehe

Thank you so much! :-D I've since "handled" that situation and life is good.

And o-m-g are you wearing push up in your new sig?

[CAINAZ]

Congratulations girl! You look amazing!

[Charity]

thanks for sharing your story!!! Your siggy looks AMAZING! I hope my 525cc's will look as good as yours do!!!

[charleneandrew]

you look fab hun.im sorry for your loss ,iv been there myself hun and its really tough i know ,i was asked a few times "oooo you had the baby "and it broke my heart .i want to tell you that since, i have had a healthy boy and altho i worried the whole way through the pregnancy he was fine .so there can be a happy ending hun.im having my BA in 18 days and im having 525cc so its lovley to see your pic cus you look sooooo good.all the best for the future hun xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[mayaonearth]

Thats a very "hard row to hoe" as they say. And while we do always find happiness in other ways, for us females I feel we so often deep down feel its our fault, or that something must be wrong with "us". Whether its boobs too small, or not having children. The very sad truth though, bad things DO happen to good people, and dont ever forget that your grief, your struggle, your pain are not the ONLY things that define you as a person. We torment ourselves with "why", "why me", and mostly theres not an answer. We do learn to accept, and we do learn to live, and we do learn to be happy again. Sweetie, you wont ever forget "where you have been", and "what happened", but a day, a time will come (if it hasnt already) that you can remember back, and it wont hurt so bad. I dont know your exact age, but I do know you are fairly young, and life can hold suprises, things we could not imagine come and reshape our lives. I am glad you could have this surgery to help restore your "self". We often look around and see so many people that "take for granted" the things we would give our lives to have or own. Its not always fair. Stay true to yourself, and you have touched us all so deeply with your genuine story. You have helped all of us today with this. I cannot change what was, or even what is, but I can feel what a truly, kind, caring and wonderful person/soul you are. I wish for you, that all you have given to others, is returned to you times ten.
I send love and light, and wish blessings of peace, prosperity, health and happiness as one truly deserving of such.
~maya~

[MMLynn]

Originally Posted by charleneandrew

you look fab hun.im sorry for your loss ,iv been there myself hun and its really tough i know ,i was asked a few times "oooo you had the baby "and it broke my heart .i want to tell you that since, i have had a healthy boy and altho i worried the whole way through the pregnancy he was fine .so there can be a happy ending hun.im having my BA in 18 days and im having 525cc so its lovley to see your pic cus you look sooooo good.all the best for the future hun xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thank you for sharing that with me. :-) I just don't know what to say to people, often I tell them what happened and it leaves people awkward not knowing what to say to me. For the most part I've grieved and moved passed it but it is so damn hard when you feel defective. Thats what makes me a woman and thats my "purpose" to society. I know my DH holds nothing against me but when I see his pain it breaks my heart.

If I can't have kids, then so be it. Maybe I'll adopt. Maybe I'll have someone else carry it for me. It's a new age and there is a lot of options. Right now I'm going to focus on me and feeling like a woman and getting back the value I need to feel in myself.

How exciting for you! 525's are terrific, I love mine. <3 all the best to you also.

[MMLynn]

Originally Posted by mayamoon49

Thats a very "hard row to hoe" as they say. And while we do always find happiness in other ways, for us females I feel we so often deep down feel its our fault, or that something must be wrong with "us". Whether its boobs too small, or not having children. The very sad truth though, bad things DO happen to good people, and dont ever forget that your grief, your struggle, your pain are not the ONLY things that define you as a person. We torment ourselves with "why", "why me", and mostly theres not an answer. We do learn to accept, and we do learn to live, and we do learn to be happy again. Sweetie, you wont ever forget "where you have been", and "what happened", but a day, a time will come (if it hasnt already) that you can remember back, and it wont hurt so bad. I dont know your exact age, but I do know you are fairly young, and life can hold suprises, things we could not imagine come and reshape our lives. I am glad you could have this surgery to help restore your "self". We often look around and see so many people that "take for granted" the things we would give our lives to have or own. Its not always fair. Stay true to yourself, and you have touched us all so deeply with your genuine story. You have helped all of us today with this. I cannot change what was, or even what is, but I can feel what a truly, kind, caring and wonderful person/soul you are. I wish for you, that all you have given to others, is returned to you times ten.
I send love and light, and wish blessings of peace, prosperity, health and happiness as one truly deserving of such.
~maya~

Thank you so so so much for your kind words.

I'm getting there now. I can watch families and look at kids play without even thinking twice. My sister recently had my nephew and thats very exciting though it was tough for me some days.

All in all, life is good. It is so much better to be out of the misery I put myself in and to let it all go. I can't forget it but I can't dwell... Nothing positive will come if I'm not receptive to the positive. I still have my moments but they are fewer and far between.

It was so much better when I was going through my stuff to know that I wasn't alone and yes, shit happens to people all the time. Hopefully I can return that to someone else.

I was afraid to post that thinking people may misconstrue what I meant, obviously a boob job can't change the past.

Thanks everyone for your warmth and understanding. :0)

[charleneandrew]

hi hun,i know what u mean hun,being asked how many kids i have is a hard one cus i feel guilty for saying 3 but if i say 4 i have to explain what happened ,when i went for my consultations this was hard as im sure it was for you explaining that u have been pregnant and had all the effects of being pregnant but having no baby .its tough .i had 2 children already so they helped me through cus i had to be strong for them ,and even tho i did have children already i still went through the feeling of a failure and why couldnt i carry this baby safely and keep him healthy like i had my others so i felt guilty.im sure the future will have babies in it for you hun and having your BA is gonna be the start of a happy future,you never truely lose those we love as they are forever in our hearts .xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[IBTC 2 BBTC]

Way to go girl!!!! Thank you for posting your story!

((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))

Jen