So Happy - And There Was Nothing to Fear!

[emcarlisle]

So, I had my ba on Friday, May 16. I want to write about it here because it was such a positive experience. I previously posted on here again and again about various neurotic questions – I was panicking about the money, I was feeling selfish because of my family, I was questioning myself as a feminist, I was scared of the pain, I was scared of anesthesia, I was scared of getting sick because of the anesthesia, I was scared I was going to wake up in the middle of surgery (I had twilight sedation), I was scared of people finding out that I had a ba, I was scared of the size turning out to be the right size – I was scared they were going to look fake, I was scared I wouldn’t be able to take care of my daughter afterwards and all the stress would create friction between my husband and I – okay, you name it, I was scared of it. I am sure I am leaving some stuff out that I could have possibly been afraid of! Oh yes, I was also scared of being naked in the operating room… How neurotic am I?

I mention that last bit because a lot of people have posted on here that they had to remove all their clothing, even their underwear. When I got ready for surgery I completely disrobed – and then the nurse came in and told me to put my pants back on, so I just put my underwear back on. Then the doctor came in and told me, no, I really could put my pants back on – as in my pants! Wow, so scared of being naked, and I got naked when I didn’t even need to be! I got to wear my pants during surgery! I'm such a dork!

Anyway, I will just say, as soon as I was getting ready to go into surgery, I realized it was just another day for the doctor and his staff. Not that they were cavalier, they were very attentive and very reassuring – but I just realized, that this is what they do, they do it every day, mostly twice a day, and I was in safe hands. The anesthesiologist spent a bit of time with me with questions, then the head nurse came in and went over more things with me, what exactly to expect, how I’d be feeling, so there would be no surprises. When I was wheeled into surgery, everyone was very cheerful with me and attentive, and before I knew it, I was out.

When I woke up, I remember looking down at my boobs and thinking they were perfect! The only downside to the experience at all was that my husband was late picking me up because he got caught behind an accident on the freeway, so the anesthesia wore off before I could take my first dose of meds. I remember waiting for my husband and feeling really antsy, like I wanted to go running out of the hospital! I think I was still loopy from the anesthesia, even though I was beginning to feel the pain. When my husband arrived, I was beyond relieved, and really uncomfortable. By the time we got home I was definitely in pain and panicking a bit! But soon enough, my meds kicked in and I slept the rest of the day. My doctor called later that night to check in on me, which I appreciated.

The next day I was in pain – but it wasn’t searing pain, it was more like uncomfortable, irritating pain. I kept on top of the meds and it was manageable. I think I felt like the lack of movement was more of an inconvenience than anything else. I got used to opening drawers and doing things with my feet - which strangely enough, my husband said was sexy!

Sunday I tried easing up on the meds because I felt a little nauseous with them. Nothing serious, but I'm one of those health nuts that can't handle caffeine or alcohol, and can't even handle most cold medicines. I just thought I'd feel better weaning myself off of them.

Today is day 4 and I was with my 21 month old daughter by myself. I just took one vicodin in the morning, cut in half and taken in two doses. Thanks to the great advice I got on this site, taking care of my toddler wasn’t difficult at all. It was tiring, (toddlers are exhausting on the best of days), but it wasn’t difficult. I am definitely surrendering to the fact that the house is going to be a mess this next couple of weeks! Tomorrow hopefully, I won’t have to take any meds.

Anyway, sorry if this is long – but I just wanted to share since I had so many doubts – and after all of it, I love the size (so far) of my boobs, I already feel excited about how I feel about myself, I can already tell it is bringing back some old chemistry between my husband and I – just because I feel good about myself, and the pain and the surgery were very small issues in the larger picture. I can tell the recovery process is going to go by quickly, and my boobs will be here for a lifetime! I love them already, and they still have their bandages and the markings. But even with the swelling into my armpits, I can tell they are going to look really natural. I love them now, and I know they are only going to get better! As I hear again and again on this site – I WISH I DID THIS AGES AGO! And I don't feel so worried now about anyone finding out if I had a ba or not, because I feel so positive about the outcome, I know I have nothing to regret.

Thanks again ladies, I have gotten some great advice from this site. And most importantly, reading the stories on this site gave me the courage to go through with it!

[kariev34]

thanks for your positive post. my surgery is tomorrow morning and i'm starting to get nervous. i enjoy reading your positive experience

[Robyn79]

YAY for your boobies!
What a reassuring story! I am just like you were... doubts, questions, worries. Hearing your story make me feel so good about going ahead with my ba.
I am so glad that you had such a positive experience. I hope your recovery continues to go smoothly.

[J*B*]

I am so happy to read about your positive experience! I am having all the scared thoughts you had, so I really appreciate reading your post how everything turned out just fine! Thank You!!

[RoseMarie]

What a great recount of your experience. Thank You!! Mine is on Thursday and I'm nervous, too!! Wish you all the best with your recovery!!!!

[norcalbabe]

hi emcarlisle ~ thanks for sharing your experience w/us. i have my BA on friday so im still in the panicky-mode but it's great to hear that your recovery is going well.

i also get to keep my pants on during surgery so im quite happy about that!