Dont touch me, don't even look at me!

[Angelblue]

I have wanted boobs since I was twenty two years old and finished nursing my son for ten months. Then came my next son, nursed for a year, and then the twins nursed for 14 months. I love my kids, all four of them, but the little monsters sure did a number on my formerly perky and actually quite beautiful boobs. There was always a reason not to get the ba, buying a house, braces for the kids, gymnastic lessons, new car, boat for hubby.... the list goes on. Now at 35 I said screw it, it's mommy's turn to get a new toy! I did all of my research on my own, found my surgeon, went to the pre-op, scheduled the surgery and then told my hubby, "guess what I'm getting boobs next month". Bless his ever loving heart he grins, lifts an eyebrow, kisses me and says okay. Gotta love him.
At the pre-op I tried on sizers for almost three hours. I'm sure i drove my ps crazy that day, if i did he didn't show it. I took two swim suits, several different shirts, and a dress and tried boobs on with all of them. When I had decided on the 400 cc the nurse said, well if that is what you really like then go for the 450 because you will lose some size under the muscle. Wow the 450 sure did look big, but what the hell.. GO big or go home. 450 it is. I have been worrying about that ever since the consult. I'm terrified that they will be too big.
Morning of the surgery I get up at 5:30 to get ready to head to the surgery center. It is a two hour drive. I slept most of the way. Drove my hubby nuts. He likes to have someone to talk to in the car. I admit i did it on purpose because he stopped at McDonald's and got breakfast and coffee. Can we say @ss Face? I can't eat or drink and he has an egg mcmuffin, hash browns and a coffee. Someday i will pay him back and it will be ugly i promise. I arrive at the surgery center at 8:30 and sit in the waiting room looking at trashy magazines. My hubby is bored already. The nurse finally takes me back to do a preg. test. I tried to tell her it wasn't necessary, hubby had a vasectomy after the twins. If I'm preggo, someone is in BIG trouble. But she insists. Guess what, not preggo big surprise. Waste of a perfectly good cup. They did tell hubby he didn't need to wait, surgery would take and hour to an hour and a half. So he kissed me and took off to home depot. The nurse took me back and gave me a lovely hat/hair net, a pair of booties and a surgical gown. can we say sexy??? Dr. came in and started drawing lines on me. He says ok, 450 in the left and and 475 in the right?? WHAT no i never said 475 anywhere. Doc says If i want 450 in larger breast i need 475 in smaller to make symmetrical. Oh god that seems so big. maybe i should do 450 and 425 instead. I'm completely thrown off and can't make a decision. I tell him just go for it. Just don't make me look like porn star. I also told the nurse i gave her complete permission to choose my size after i was asleep. I totally trusted her to not let me get too big.
Anesthesiologist came in and was very nice. numbed my hand before putting in the iv. Also told me i had the tiniest veins he had ever seen and would make a horrible iv drug user. I said thanks for the update but i didn't think that would ever be an issue. He did give me some nausea med in my IV and some very yummy medicine that was supposed to "relax" me. Holy moly, Heaven in a needle. Can i have some to go???? no, oh well. That would be the last thing i remember. no counting, no molten lava thru my iv. Just waking up gently in recovery. I kind of drifted awake. Had a hard time opening my eyes. I layed around in recovery for 20 minutes or so and the nurse helped dress me and walked me to the car. I slept the car ride home. and have been in constant pain ever since. No ammount of percoset, ice, and Valium can take away the constant pressure and pain. Oh lord i hope this gets better soon.
My hubby wanted to touch the "girls" I gave him the death glare and told him he would quite possibly lose a hand if even came close to touching my breast. If he even looks at me wrong I may throw a sharp object at him.

[FoxyBooBear]

Thanks for sharing your story. It was very fun to read. You have a great sense of humor. Let us know how you progress. I am almost 2 weeks out and I can tell you each day gets better.

[Lindaann]

Been there! Mine felt like they were gonna explode. And then, from the tensor bandage I think, my nipple was all chaffed...so no touchie! I'm at 2 weeks now, on Monday, and I have to say...although careful with the girls, hubby and I had an amazing weekend. It will get better!

[blueayes]

That's a great story.....it actually had me laughing out loud.

Hang in there...it will definitely get better and dh will have his opportunity to do some investigating without fear of losing a limb.

Keep us posted!

[Suprmama]

I had a lot of pain too - but had oxycodone to at least make me pass out in a coma. In between meds I thought my cleavage was going to burst open! After a week I was 80% back to my routine and by 2 1/2 weeks all pain was gone (they were still hard though for a couple of months).

[fitmomofthree]

Love the story!! You had me cracking up!! It's good to see you still have a sense of humor given the misery you're in right now. I haven't had mine yet, but I'm sure it will get MUCH better. Hopefully sooner than later! Take care!!

[sendie]

I loved reading your story, best laugh I've had all day! I'm sorry you're having pain right now, but it does get better. My husband keeps asking when he can "play" with mine also. He works out of state so I haven't had to fight him off yet, but he'll be home next week...We'll see how I feel then or I may have to remember the sharp object like you.

[MustangBabe]

Thanks for sharing! I loved your story!!! Yes, it does get better! It'll be better before you know it. Good luck & keep us posted!

[harleysmom]

Like the others said thanks for sharing. The McDonalds thing, Yeah pay him back for all of us. I am a month out and feel great. The pressure will get better. I think I drove my PS's staff crazy on the size too. That is a hard decision and one we all have agonized over. You are going to look great and Yes I would guess you will be one healthy D cup or more. I have a small band 32 and am a DDD/F. Let us know how your recovery goes. By the way I have just recently let DH touch the new girls. Make him wait. LOL

[dreamscometrue]

Angelblue,
Im so sorry you feel so much painDay2-5 seem to be the hardest...BUT it does get better!!
Thinking of yousoft hugs
Dreams

[SAHGKC]

Your story was very entertaining! I can tell you that I felt EXACTLY how you feel, and yes it will get better and quickly. You will feel much better in just a few days, not 100%, but drastically different than you feel now. Day 5 and 6 were the turning point, and day 10 was when I finally felt that I had turned the corner towards normalcy. You're close; just hang in there!

[Trailrunner]

Hey no fair writing with so much humor! It still hurts to laugh! Seriously, I enjoyed your recount and admire your efficiency. I am a week out and still haven't written my story, which is not nearly as colorful as yours! I had twilight so with the exception of getting prepped, the whole morning is one big fat blank.
Congrats and know that the discomfort will get a lot better by day 3 or 4. I was able to get off the meds by day 4. I still take Tylenol and Tramadol which is a non narcotic I use for my spinal issues, but nothing like the hard stuff they give you for the BA. Rest and recover!

[Angelblue]

Thanks for the support! I do feel a tiny bit better today. Although I'm sure double dose of drugs may have something to do with it. Drove to the gas station today. Woah bad idea, almost had to have the 15 year old drive home. Less than a mile and serious muscle spasms in the boobs. Post op check up with ps tomorrow, hoping he will get this stinking compression bra off me and let me wear a reg. sport bra. my armpits are raw.

[tupperware_mama]

LOL! Thanks for the story. I hope that the pain gets better asap!

[Hazeleyes]

You are hilarious!! I loved your story.