My story finally - there is light at the end of the tunnel!

[bgirlie]

Ok its been about 8 days since my BA and I didnt want to write earlier because it would have been totally negative. I read everyones stories and never thought I`d be one of the negative stories, let alone one of the regretful stories!

Day of surgery I woke up, I barely slept a wink just like everyone else probably! I showered, did all the prerequisites and got into my sweats and zip up hoodie and took off for the surgery center. We got there right on time but waited a bit before we got in. They took my vitals and we went over everything, and I started to freak out. Suddenly 550 was WAY too big for me, and OMG am I doing the right thing, do I even want this? I attributed it to the jitters and was like ok, I'll downsize to 500 and they're like dude you had to have told us this BEFORE the morning of surgery! So they looked and thankfully had 500's there woot!

So ahead we go, I say goodbye to the bf and get scared as we walk to the operation room. I suddenly got scared that I had to pee again and didnt want to pee on the table eep! So I asked to pee, I think they thought I was totally chickening out! I peed and while in the bathroom lifted up my gown and thought, but they're good boobies! Ok I will decide in the next 2 seconds... then I was talking to a nurse about hawaii (she was trying to calm me down) and I was on the operating table with the IV in. I thought they'd tell me ok, sleepy time! like when I had gotten my wisdom teeth out but seriously next thing I knew.. I was in recovery barely staying awake! I felt bad that I couldnt stay awake even though I tried. When I finally got up they were like wow you weren't kidding when you said you're a natural and don't take any kind of drugs.. you super reacted to the anethesia! I was like told ya guys.. lol

So they grabbed me a wheelchair and brought me down to my car, my bf was such a sweetie and had everything there for me, water, blanket, pillow, it was so nice. Bumps hurt but it was ok because I was pretty numb on the boobs. I got home and was zonked, straight out to sleep! Can't really remember much of day one or 2, I was on T3's and antibiotics. On night 3 I woke up with a fever and threw up nothign but stomach acid ew.. then stopped taking pain pills AND antibiotics. I called and asked to make sure thats ok and they said yep!

My first almost week I thought I'd made the dumbest mistake and had already started looking into how much it would cost to get them removed. I felt that they weren't me, I had fine boobs before just little, now I had these weird foreign objects in me, I was SO disapointed in myself! I felt selfish like I could've spent the money better.. I was just generally down on myself about everything and definitely beating myself up. ontop of that, the T3's made me constipated and I didn't poop for a WEEK ugh! Irritable times a million!

I was sent home in a sports bra that was definitely too small, it was like a 34 fits A,B,C and it definitely screwed up my underarms. I swoll up and cried like a baby until the dear bf searched the city for a sports bra for me and found one that was definitely too big but I ddin't care, as long as I wasn't in pain anymore!

I felt really gross wearing the bra though, it was more of a real bra that an 80 year old woman would wear than a sports bra. Ontop of feeling like a football linebacker, I felt matronly and fat from not going tot he bathroom, just horrid. So today was my post op visit and I was cleared to wear anything I'd like as long as it's comfortable for me, so I went and grabbed a soft cotton tshirt bra from lasenza and took out the underwire, yay! I feel much more feminine now. I bought a 34D and it doesnt fit against my breast bone so I'm probably a 32DD but I'm not going to buy a lot of bras right away because I don't want to throw away money before I drop/fluff.

All in all I'm trying to remember not to be so harsh on myself, to go with the flow and focus on the positive. They're starting to get a wee bit softer and drop just a teeny bit and if I dare say, I'm actually getting EXCITED! The bf finally got to touch today (poor thing) and his eyes just got big. He said he doesn't like them better than my little boobies, they're just different. Buttttttt... boys like their big boobies we all know

Sorry my story is so long (I liked reading the really long stories though) but I just hadn't read many OMG I made a bad decision! stories on here, so I thought I'd write it all out and say yes there is a light at the end of the tunnel, just be NICE to yourself. Thanks to wishful yogini for helping me through a very tough time, she spoke me through the whole way and I don't think I'd be a very happy camper right now if it weren't for her. Good friends are hard to come by!

[Babe101]

so glad your feeling so much better,, and it does get better each day.. good luck to you

[MrsNoboob]

congrats.. i'm so scared that i'm going to see my boobs in january and be like WHHYYYY... i've always be scared that it'll make me look heavy... waaaaa!! but i have to stay positive.. this is what i want! they will be beautiful!!!! I appreciate your "realist" story.. i'm sure many feel that way. xoxo

[Excited]

Congrats girlie glad everything went well take care

[cookie1168]

Wow thank you so much for being honest and real. I will be getting my ba soon and reading this makes me feel better just because I know if by chance I feel this way I know it will get better

[kelzaqt]

I agree, i think it is wonderful you could share your innermost negative feelings about your BA expreience with us, well done.
I hope to be sharing my story soon also.
Congrats and post more pics, lol!

X Kel X

[meowmeow]

Originally Posted by bgirlie

My first almost week I thought I'd made the dumbest mistake and had already started looking into how much it would cost to get them removed. I felt that they weren't me, I had fine boobs before just little, now I had these weird foreign objects in me, I was SO disapointed in myself! I felt selfish like I could've spent the money better.. I was just generally down on myself about everything and definitely beating myself up. ontop of that, the T3's made me constipated and I didn't poop for a WEEK ugh! Irritable times a million!

I CRIED AND CRIED the first 5 days after my BA. I thought the exact same things you did! I thought my boobs were gross and big and ugly and that I'd made a HUGE (literally) mistake. What a selfish stupid thing to do. I told my mom I wanted the implants out right away and that I wanted to kill myself - I mean WHAT??? Who thinks/says that? I was CRAZY. I also didn't poo for days. Maybe that was the reason for wanting death.

But I'm cool now. I have a totally different attitude. Just thought I'd let you know that you aren't the only one who had a rough initial reaction. But I'm really happy now! What a difference a few days make.

[LuckyFour]

Thank you so much for your story!!! My surgery is 2-days away and I feel like I am on a roller coaster ride already. Your story was both informative and encouraging. Congratulations and happy healing to you!

[tattoogrl4ever]

Conrats on your new boobs

[CuriousKristy]

Wow. You really typed up the whole story there. Congrats, rest up and enjoy the new girls.

[Jensyn]

I loved the story simply because you seemed very honest about both the good and the bad! I think I'm going to be the same way as you right before the surgery, I'll probably freak out too.

[bgirlie]

thanks everyone, I'm on day 9 right now and finally got a shirt over my head, wowee! I'm hoping the swelling goes down because these are some big mambos, but with each day I'm starting to like them more and more. Probably because last night was the first night I layed down flat to sleep, woot woot!

[dkh1971]

Thank you so much for sharing your story with us. I'm glad you are feeling better about your decision.

BTW - you look awesome in your avatar picture. Gorgeous!

[Nelly_Bot]

I would say it's probably more the meds than anything. When you think about it, it is definitely a major surgery. It's stressful and "unneccessary" so it's easy to see how you would feel remorse/regret immediately after. Just give it some time... once you get back to yourself and go along with the healing process, I'm confident you'll LOVE them. =) Don't worry; Be happy.