Depressed Today

[TAC32]

Hi again ladies, I am feeling so sad today. Aside from the fact the weather is horrible, and I am losing sleep (see my sleep thread) I also overdid things yesterday and am feeling it today. Back on mild amount of pain pills today. I am emotional, I feel bad that my husband is doing everything and I feel so helpless. My little baby, he's 2 1/2, wants so badly for me to pick him up and hold him and I can't -I really miss this! Hubby is trying to be extra careful because my baby is really rough and all boy, and he is scared he will hurt me. It's killing me to know that I am sitting here not doing anything (I am usually a busy body) and feel almost incapacitated! I am dying from not working out, feel like I am getting fat again (the scales have went up about 5-6 lbs). I am thinking, what have I done!? Why am I putting my family through this!? I miss sleeping w/ hubby...and cuddling. I talk to my husband about it this morning as I cried to him, he told me it is only short term and to not worry. I can't help it. I also was hoping to go back to work tomorrow, but I think I am going to end up working from home a few days. My manager approved this beforehand, so I think I am going to have no choice but to take advantage of it! Did anyone else feel this way or go through these things? Sorry this is so long....

[bealotus82]

Awwww honey...don't worry...this is all very normal...
You just had surgery...remember that...of course you are going to be a couple of pounds heavier...it is so normal....once you heal you can go back to working out but not now..I understand that you are tired of sitting there but it is part of the recovery.
I went through the same thing...I cried,...i over did it too...i felt bad for my fiance doing everything...i missed playing with my 3 y/o daughter, i felt fat,i felt lazy...believe me, give it one more week and you will feel much better.

If sometimes you feel like talking to someone send me a PM and if I am here we could go to the chat.
Try to get distracted,watch tv, read a book, take your pills...i really hope you can have a good night sleep tonight.

Take care,and this will be over before you know it and it will be worth it.
You are going to have amazing boobs!

[Storm]

It will get better. In all honesty, before i started aching all day long was a month. Now , except for morning boob, i am fine.
I cried for days. I was in alot of pain day 3 with the facial surg and i said why did i do this too.
1 day at a time.

[milla]

agree with Bea and Anne. this is really the worst part of it all. feeling miserable and thinking "why did i do this to myself" is very normal especially when you have a family to look after. its a mixture of the meds you received during the procedure, the pain meds wearing off ... a bit of everything really. plus, you can't see the results yet so you can't yet appreciate why you did this.

soon it will all become clear to you. of that i can assure you.
good luck sweetie and happy healing

[cheatingheart]

This is easy for me to say now, but after my breast augmentation on 3/6 I'll probably be on here as the one moaning and feeling depressed...

It's temporary. You're not going to feel this way forever, but you'll still have your new boobs! Your husband is doing more than usual, but think of all the things you normally do that he never has to - this is good for him! I really doubt he minds; I know my husband is really looking forward to my new boobs. He thinks he's going to enjoy them as much as I will, even though I know he won't - I keep thinking of going shopping and looking good in everything I try on!

The worst part is probably not being able to cuddle your little guy. My youngest is 6, but he's also the world's biggest snuggler, and I know it's going to kill me to not be able to cuddle him. We're not telling our kids about my surgery, so we're going to tell him I'm sick (with the flu, or something) and we don't want him to get my germs. I already know I'm going to feel bad about it. I'll look forward to hugging him much more than being able to open jars or cupboards or whatever.

I know I'll be back on here in about two weeks asking for the rest of you to boost me back up, so I hope by then you'll be able to honestly reassure me that "this too shall pass"! Good luck, and I know you'll be feeling better soon. Go admire yourself in the mirror for a while!

[Kathlene]

Originally Posted by TAC32

he told me it is only short term and to not worry.

He is so right. You are still so early post op. What you are feeling is normal. But just remember.... you knew before hand that you would need some time to rest and heal. It was ok then... and Hon, it is even more ok now!!! Hang in there.

Also have your hubby place your child on your lap, with his back to you, so that he can't push and grab. Place a pillow between you if that will help.

[Peachesp313]

Oh hon, I'm so sorry you are feeling so down. It's understandable, though. You just want to get back to normal (with bigger better boobies of course) and you aren't able to right now. And I'm sure not being to pick up or hold your boy makes it harder...for some reason hugging our babies makes us feel better, and you can't get that right now.
It sounds like your hubby is very supportive and understanding...that's a plus.

I know I will feel the same way you do after I have mine done...the feeling guilty about having hubby take care of you...I expect to feel that, too. But hopefully your hubby expected to have to take care of you...mine does...and I have PROMISED to make it up to him afterward (you can guess what he has asked for, lol!) as much as he wants, ha ha!

I also promised our older son that after I feel better I will take him and his cousins to Chuck E Cheese for a whole day of kids' fun!

Perhaps, if you look at things that way, it might help to lift your spirits?? It is temporary...you'll be back to yourself in no time, and all of this will be a fuzzy memory.

Wishing you the best of luck, and hoping you begin to feel better very soon!

[SnowBunny]

Awwww, you sound so sad ... please try to feel better and accept the help from your husband. It won't be too much longer before you are back to doing everything for your family and making them comfortable, take this time for you and your healing. You will feel so much better in many ways before long and it will all be worth it.

[Tamster]

did anyone else feel this way ?? YOU BET !! i think most of us...i am totally out of my comfort zone this time...i am forcing myself to do only what's necessary...last time i did as much as i could as soon as i could and that didn't pay off at all....lesson learned...listen to your hubby...he's right, this is short term and know that it's very good(a gift in fact) for your son and husband to have this special time together...
meds mess with you mind and body ...a few extra pounds is typical after any surgery...don't worry about that one little bit...you'll be back in the gym in no time.....remember the slower you do things now the faster you will be back to yourself ...well back to yourself with fabulous new boobs and a brighter more confident smile

[Slinky]

Is there anybody out there who DIDN'T feel this way at some point? It will pass, I promise.

It's good for our hubbys to do some of the caregiving occasionally, hard tho' it is to sit back and let them do it. I know how you are feeling. I like to do for myself, too, but there's a time to sit back and take is easy and this is that time for you. It won't last long and you'll be back to your normal self with the extra added bonus of having the boobs you want. It's worth it. You are worth it.

Annie

[Victoria]

I went through this a few days ago. I was just emotional, negative, scared, tired, and extra sore. I had overdone it myself. The best thing for me was some rest, and a good crying. I watched a cute movie, with a happy ending and sobbed through the last 15 minutes of it. Hubby walked in and I just sobbed for another while. (Mind you I was frusterated even with the fact that he can't hold me tight-- like I so need--my love language is physical touch) My body just had had it. I wanted to tough it out, be the good patient (okay I'm and overacheiver I wanted to be the best patient) and I wanted to be done with meds. I felt like I was failing. Today I feel much better. I feel like I'm turning a corner (dare I say it) we'll see what tomorrow or even this afternoon holds--but I think that .....

poor sleep, coming off meds, mama guilt, lack of exercise (especially when our bodies are used to it, broken muscles & healing boobies, doing a little too much, etc.--and feeling so helpless are a BAD mix.

I say this even to myself right now. We are normal, the ups and downs are okay--but so scary when we are used to "saving the world".

I wish you a smile and want to encourage all of us in this tough healing time (me too) that it's okay to feel. That's why I love this forum. We have each other--and we do understand!

[hortongirl]

Baby, you are SO not alone. Even with where I am I still am going throught the motions. I think just the mixed emotions and unfortunately for me I had the second procedure so I had a relapse if you will so I am having to bases everything I do from the second time and not the first time. But I am still achy and am thinking this isn't normal, but when I spoke to the PS last week he said it is normal and maybe b/c I am doing too much too soon is why my recovery is moving slow and why I am still feeling things. I am just ready to get better, but at this point I have literally given myself 6 weeks from the second procedure, so anything before April I am not going to worry about.

[ColdinNY]

just don't overdo it like I did...

I was feeling so guilty for being laid up, that I was really doing things I shouldn't have been, and now I am 6 wks post op, and still feel pain and discomfort.

Short term sacrifice for long term happiness!

[danimb14]

Hey there, It is so good to hear that I am not the only one here feeling this way. 9 days po and I still feel like I can't push myself to do things that I want to. I have 3 kids 9,5,11months and it has been so hard for me w/ the baby. I really feel terrible not being able to pick her up. I hope this too shall pass. We always blame ourselves, instead of realizing that once in a while we are entitled to not feel good. My husband was very supported in beginning, but I think now he is starting to get frustrated, doing alot of the work. I don't think any of us realize how long this recovery truly is... I too felt bad for him, but you have to be true to yourself and say if I could I would. We don't want to set ourselves up for complications which will put us in a worse situation. Let the hubs suck it up for now, before you know it we will be back to ourselves and praying for a day to just do nothing and lay down.

CHEER UP!!! The best is yet to come.

[Skipper]

I went through a depression at two weeks. Do a search on depression/depressed and you will see this is VERY common. Get your 2 1/2 year old to stand in front of you and give SOFT big hugs that way. Have your kids lay on their bellies/or backs and give them a good back scratch and some nuzzles - esp. at nighttime before bed.

I'm so glad I can give bear hugs again!!!(That alone could be depressing you -we need 4 hugs a day!!). It's get's better every day so hang in there!!!

[TAC32]

Hi ladies, thanks for all of your kind words and encouragement. You are all truly great and I am so glad I have this website. Thanks for the useful ideas with the kids, I do think that not being able to give BIG hugs is a lot of it for me. I am a very touch feely person, this is killing me. I am also an over achiever and wanted to be the perfect patient and feel better in no time to lessen the load for hubby, now I feel like a failure. BUT..I do understand that this is short term, it will be over soon, and I will be begging them to wait on me hand and foot again! I also understand that being hard headed or tough, can only lengthen my recovery and not make things worse. I will definitely remember this! I thought too the recovery would be more simple, the way everything reads. We take for granted all the things we can do before, and then how we are affected afterwards. I really appreciate the advice, and will use it! If needed, I will gladly return the support to some of the ladies that have not gone through this yet! Take care! You all are the best!

[Victory]

You are so early into this thing, and post-surgical depression is not uncommon. The weight gain is temporary I'm sure, and that alone can make you feel kind of blah. It sounds as if your husband is dealing well with your recovery and has been pretty understanding? I suspect, in not too many days, you will once again be reassured of why you did this to begin with. The depression will all be past and you will be enjoying the new you and your family again. In fact, you'll proably feel so great about yourself that when you do get back to your workouts you will be back to fighting weight in no time. AND, just think about all those mirrors at the gym... you'll get to look into them - pretending you are watching your routine and technique, when in fact you'll actually be smiling... and admiring the new you!

[Nan]

I can't add anything to what has already been said so I just want to send wonderful wishes and prayers for feeling better soon. Just like someone else said, I really don't think most of us have a realistic idea of what the recovery from this surgery is going to be like. It's harder than we thought it would be. We all think that we are the extra special good patient and that we are going to bounce back in record time. Most of us find out we are just average. Imagine that, average women. Huh! Who'd a thought it?

[TAC32]

I am sorry my thread sounded so doom and gloom on Sunday. I wanted to update you all that posted and say I am fine..today has been better and everything in general I complained about has been better. I mainly post this for others to see that yes, we have bad days after breast augmentation surgery - expect them, but then we have good days. Also, to show any new ladies here that the ladies here are very good about offering advice and support that is MOST useful and supportive! Take care everyone.....