what should i do? - JustBreastImplants.com Forums - Breast Augmentation, Breast Implants, and Plastic Surgeons

russiansfinest · 08-19-2008, 12:04 PM

ok well, you all know how i am planning on getting implants in about 3 weeks.... well, my boyfriend is helping me out financially. i am pitching alot in too, but he is putting most of it in for the implants. anyway, i am starting to feel as if he is trying to get the biggest size of me that he can. he goes on this site after i told him not to since this was my place to research and talk to women, and he needs to stop trying to intervene too much. but, he doesnt seem to get it. he said that this is a gift for me, and that i get what i want. but, i feel as if he is trying to push the size more and more, and it frustrates me. what should i do??

AllyKat8 · 08-19-2008, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by russiansfinest

ok well, you all know how i am planning on getting implants in about 3 weeks.... well, my boyfriend is helping me out financially. i am pitching alot in too, but he is putting most of it in for the implants. anyway, i am starting to feel as if he is trying to get the biggest size of me that he can. he goes on this site after i told him not to since this was my place to research and talk to women, and he needs to stop trying to intervene too much. but, he doesnt seem to get it. he said that this is a gift for me, and that i get what i want. but, i feel as if he is trying to push the size more and more, and it frustrates me. what should i do??

since he is paying for most of it, he probably feels like he should have a big say in what you chose to do. I think if you are going to allow him to pay for some of it you also need to allow him to have a say in the end result. Thats just my opinion though. Explain to him what size you want and why...listen to what he wants and why then try to compromise.

HTH

russiansfinest · 08-19-2008, 01:55 PM

yea, i have listened to him and all. i think that maybe he is scared that they will be too small and we both will be unhappy about them. he just came over about 10 minutes ago, and we talked before he went to work and he thinks my ps is being conservative. and i told him that he knows alot more since he has done this for a billion years and if he says that 400 would get me a small d, then thats what he says. this is our first huge thing to do together; which is for our 2 year anniversary... so i think he wants it to be perfect but isnt handling it the right way

Lovely · 08-19-2008, 02:01 PM

First of ALL. LUCKY YOU!
I wish my bf was so generous and eager to help. Mine is the opposite.lol
I think if i say one more thing about boobs he is gonna leave me..
I think you should definitely let him have his 2 cents but tell him realistically what you want.. Even though he is paying for most of it, its still your body and do whatever makes YOU comfortable.
BTW 400 sounds about right...

wocky · 08-19-2008, 02:07 PM

This is such a tough one. I can see why he thinks that he should be able to get "his money's worth," but it is YOUR body. Try impressing that upon him (it may take several conversations), and see if he starts to understand. This isn't like him buying you a car, this is your HEALTH. Going too big for your frame could lead to complications.

If he continues to insist that you should get big 'uns because he's the one paying for them, then that shows a chauvinistic lack of regard for you, and the financial arrangement probably isn't such a good idea after all. If you're in good financial shape yourself, you could always take out a loan.

soooexcited · 08-19-2008, 02:21 PM

I am a little different and think if he is paying for it that does not mean he should be allowed to say what you get. If he truly supports you it should be what you want and not anyone else (all the way to talk about size). I think you have to go with what YOU want!! No one else.

Good luck

tabby15208 · 08-19-2008, 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by soooexcited

I am a little different and think if he is paying for it that does not mean he should be allowed to say what you get. If he truly supports you it should be what you want and not anyone else (all the way to talk about size). I think you have to go with what YOU want!! No one else.

Good luck

Agreed! They are his financially, but they are still in your body...400 sounds plenty big to me, and if your PS thinks 400 is a good amount, why push the envelope? BF needs to realize that PS is the expert on this one!!

russiansfinest · 08-19-2008, 03:01 PM

yea, i told him to leave it to the ps since he knows ALOT more than him.... my BF is really cautious, but sometimes does not listen. my ps said that more than 400 would be pushing it since i have a small frame and that 390-400 would get me a small D. I told him that if he wants to research, to do it with me, and not think that he can do this alone, because we are doing this together.... everyone on here is so nice! thanks you everyone

this is going to be an amazing experience, and i cant wait to show my pics when i get them done!!

Nanny66 · 08-19-2008, 03:02 PM

Seriously, i think the first thing you should do is speak to a mod, and get your username/password changed, so he can't get on here anymore...men are not allowed on here, and you risk getting yourself banned in the process.

next, you need to tell him you are grateful for the financial input he is giving, but anything else is ultimately your input x

russiansfinest · 08-19-2008, 03:06 PM

yea, i told him men cant get on here. he does not know my username or password, so there is not much he can do. i told him if he wants to get on the site, he can look at it when i get on when he is around me.

titangirl · 08-19-2008, 04:36 PM

I think 400 will give you a D for sure. I started out a B and didn't even get 300cc and ended up with a full C/small D. I personally wouldn't let him choose your size unless you are comfortable with it....its your body.

khollyp · 08-19-2008, 04:36 PM

Uh-no way in hell Id let him chose. Id definitely take in to consideration his input but its your body and you have to live with them the rest of your life. The boobs are gonna be with you forever, he might not be.

My husband wants me to get bigger ones too when I get them done. I am 5'10 and will probably go a full D, or whatever the ps says is proportional to my body, but I am a professional and dont want my boobs to be in peoples faces. I work in the medical field and have to be taken seriously!
I just told my husband that I use to have a disk issue in my back, and that if I go too large it'll cause my back problem to flare up! =) That was that.

In the end its your body. Your choice.

CupcakeWife · 08-19-2008, 08:33 PM

bottom line, your body, your doctor, you choice.

lennie · 08-19-2008, 08:43 PM

THis is not your boyfriend's decision whether he chooses to put up the money or not. It is your body and you need to be happy with it. If you have to, take out a loan for the part you do not have or wait till you can pay for them yourself. Then, it will not be anyone's decision but your own.

My dh and I had many discussions where he tried to coerce me to go larger than I wanted. I finally did say middle c over a small c (not that much difference) and continually had to tell my dh that I would not be comfy with them too big, I only wanted to get back the perkiness and upper fullness I had lost. My dh was going to split the cost and tried to use that against me saying if he was paying, he had a say. I told him that I did not want his money and would pay for them myself, it was my body. He understood and agreed that I need to be comfortable with what I get and ANYTHING would be bigger than the ones I had. (He still split the cost with me and is very pleased thought he wishes they were bigger!!)LOL

You bf may not always be around but your boobs are attached to you and will go everywhere you do. LOL.

russiansfinest · 08-19-2008, 08:48 PM

lol yea.. i mean, he told me that this is a gift for our 2 year anniversary and he wants me to be happy. but i think he might feel left out that i am not including him.. i want to be big, and he thinks he knows everything so i think he thinks he knows the sizes and everything. today we agreed that on my pre-op that we will do the sizers again and that i will show him that 400 will get me a small d...

08-19-2008, 12:04 PM	#1
russiansfinest Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: allen texas Posts: 165 Thanks: 5 Thanked 41 Times in 38 Posts	what should i do? ok well, you all know how i am planning on getting implants in about 3 weeks.... well, my boyfriend is helping me out financially. i am pitching alot in too, but he is putting most of it in for the implants. anyway, i am starting to feel as if he is trying to get the biggest size of me that he can. he goes on this site after i told him not to since this was my place to research and talk to women, and he needs to stop trying to intervene too much. but, he doesnt seem to get it. he said that this is a gift for me, and that i get what i want. but, i feel as if he is trying to push the size more and more, and it frustrates me. what should i do??

08-19-2008, 02:01 PM	#4
Lovely Any Questions R Welcomed Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: San Francisco Posts: 1,150 Thanks: 343 Thanked 322 Times in 275 Posts	First of ALL. LUCKY YOU! I wish my bf was so generous and eager to help. Mine is the opposite.lol I think if i say one more thing about boobs he is gonna leave me.. I think you should definitely let him have his 2 cents but tell him realistically what you want.. Even though he is paying for most of it, its still your body and do whatever makes YOU comfortable. BTW 400 sounds about right... __________________ Lovely 1st breast augmentation (July 2007) Ht: 5'9 Wt: 138 Pre Op= 34A Post Op= 36B/34C 400cc/Mod/Saline(Overs) (Bottoming out/Rippling) 2nd breast augmentation Date: (May 2008) 660cc/Mod+/Saline(Unders) Post Op= 36D-34DD(small) (Pocket Revision/Rippling on Right Boob) 3rd breast augmentation Early December 800cc/High Profile/Silicone(Unders) ..Wish Me Luck.. 34D bra below..(can you believe 660cc AND i can still fit 34D =(

08-19-2008, 02:07 PM	#5
wocky 1 BIG BOOB, 1 little boob Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: California Posts: 832 Thanks: 311 Thanked 344 Times in 292 Posts	This is such a tough one. I can see why he thinks that he should be able to get "his money's worth," but it is YOUR body. Try impressing that upon him (it may take several conversations), and see if he starts to understand. This isn't like him buying you a car, this is your HEALTH. Going too big for your frame could lead to complications. If he continues to insist that you should get big 'uns because he's the one paying for them, then that shows a chauvinistic lack of regard for you, and the financial arrangement probably isn't such a good idea after all. If you're in good financial shape yourself, you could always take out a loan. __________________ Married mom of 2 sweet kids, both breastfed Pre-BA: deflated 32A/B Post-BA: 32B/C 26.5" ribcage, 5'2", 100lbs. 200cc full unders, Mentor MemoryGel mod profile silicones, transareolar incision BA, FTT w/MR, flank lipo on Feb. 5, 2008 Considering revision to correct pre-existing asymmetry that wasn't fully addressed at my BA (by lowering left crease). Sometime in late 2009?

08-19-2008, 03:02 PM	#9
Nanny66 Nanny to Evie Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Uk Posts: 4,987 Thanks: 887 Thanked 1,468 Times in 1,276 Posts	Seriously, i think the first thing you should do is speak to a mod, and get your username/password changed, so he can't get on here anymore...men are not allowed on here, and you risk getting yourself banned in the process. next, you need to tell him you are grateful for the financial input he is giving, but anything else is ultimately your input x __________________

08-19-2008, 04:36 PM	#11
titangirl I love you girls! Join Date: May 2008 Location: Tennessee Posts: 735 My Mood: Thanks: 223 Thanked 315 Times in 286 Posts	I think 400 will give you a D for sure. I started out a B and didn't even get 300cc and ended up with a full C/small D. I personally wouldn't let him choose your size unless you are comfortable with it....its your body. __________________ 5’3 110lbs 29 yrs old 27-28in ribcage = 32 band (too tight) (34 just feels better) Pre BA – 34B Post BA – 34 C Surgery Date 5/16/08 Mentor Smooth Round HP Saline L: 250cc R: 275cc Redo for Bottoming Out & Going Bigger 10/16/08 L: 350cc R:375cc

08-19-2008, 01:55 PM	#3
russiansfinest Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: allen texas Posts: 165 Thanks: 5 Thanked 41 Times in 38 Posts	yea, i have listened to him and all. i think that maybe he is scared that they will be too small and we both will be unhappy about them. he just came over about 10 minutes ago, and we talked before he went to work and he thinks my ps is being conservative. and i told him that he knows alot more since he has done this for a billion years and if he says that 400 would get me a small d, then thats what he says. this is our first huge thing to do together; which is for our 2 year anniversary... so i think he wants it to be perfect but isnt handling it the right way

08-19-2008, 02:21 PM	#6
soooexcited Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: US Posts: 346 My Mood: Thanks: 81 Thanked 117 Times in 102 Posts	I am a little different and think if he is paying for it that does not mean he should be allowed to say what you get. If he truly supports you it should be what you want and not anyone else (all the way to talk about size). I think you have to go with what YOU want!! No one else. Good luck

08-19-2008, 03:01 PM	#8
russiansfinest Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: allen texas Posts: 165 Thanks: 5 Thanked 41 Times in 38 Posts	yea, i told him to leave it to the ps since he knows ALOT more than him.... my BF is really cautious, but sometimes does not listen. my ps said that more than 400 would be pushing it since i have a small frame and that 390-400 would get me a small D. I told him that if he wants to research, to do it with me, and not think that he can do this alone, because we are doing this together.... everyone on here is so nice! thanks you everyone this is going to be an amazing experience, and i cant wait to show my pics when i get them done!!

08-19-2008, 03:06 PM	#10
russiansfinest Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: allen texas Posts: 165 Thanks: 5 Thanked 41 Times in 38 Posts	yea, i told him men cant get on here. he does not know my username or password, so there is not much he can do. i told him if he wants to get on the site, he can look at it when i get on when he is around me.

08-19-2008, 04:36 PM	#12
khollyp Join Date: Aug 2008 Location: virginia beach virginia Posts: 12 My Mood: Thanks: 0 Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts	Uh-no way in hell Id let him chose. Id definitely take in to consideration his input but its your body and you have to live with them the rest of your life. The boobs are gonna be with you forever, he might not be. My husband wants me to get bigger ones too when I get them done. I am 5'10 and will probably go a full D, or whatever the ps says is proportional to my body, but I am a professional and dont want my boobs to be in peoples faces. I work in the medical field and have to be taken seriously! I just told my husband that I use to have a disk issue in my back, and that if I go too large it'll cause my back problem to flare up! =) That was that. In the end its your body. Your choice.

08-19-2008, 08:33 PM	#13
CupcakeWife Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Las Vegas Posts: 119 Thanks: 0 Thanked 41 Times in 38 Posts	bottom line, your body, your doctor, you choice. __________________

08-19-2008, 08:43 PM	#14
lennie Join Date: May 2008 Location: N/A Posts: 1,107 My Mood: Thanks: 611 Thanked 391 Times in 364 Posts	THis is not your boyfriend's decision whether he chooses to put up the money or not. It is your body and you need to be happy with it. If you have to, take out a loan for the part you do not have or wait till you can pay for them yourself. Then, it will not be anyone's decision but your own. My dh and I had many discussions where he tried to coerce me to go larger than I wanted. I finally did say middle c over a small c (not that much difference) and continually had to tell my dh that I would not be comfy with them too big, I only wanted to get back the perkiness and upper fullness I had lost. My dh was going to split the cost and tried to use that against me saying if he was paying, he had a say. I told him that I did not want his money and would pay for them myself, it was my body. He understood and agreed that I need to be comfortable with what I get and ANYTHING would be bigger than the ones I had. (He still split the cost with me and is very pleased thought he wishes they were bigger!!)LOL You bf may not always be around but your boobs are attached to you and will go everywhere you do. LOL. __________________ Height: 5' 4 1/2" Weight: 111 Pre BA: 32b/34a (lots of extra room in bra) 350 cc's Mentor Silicone HP's Unders[/size] Crease Incision 28" ribcage Post BA: 32D/34C BA date: June 6

08-19-2008, 08:48 PM	#15
russiansfinest Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: allen texas Posts: 165 Thanks: 5 Thanked 41 Times in 38 Posts	lol yea.. i mean, he told me that this is a gift for our 2 year anniversary and he wants me to be happy. but i think he might feel left out that i am not including him.. i want to be big, and he thinks he knows everything so i think he thinks he knows the sizes and everything. today we agreed that on my pre-op that we will do the sizers again and that i will show him that 400 will get me a small d...