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Boyfriend won't let me get a boob revision

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Old 06-06-2016, 06:05 AM
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Unhappy Boyfriend won't let me get a boob revision

Girls,

I really need some advice. In January 2014, when I was single, I got a boob job. Since then I have been dating a man for almost 2 years. Since we have been dating he has known that I have wanted a boob revision because I am very unhappy with my boobs, and yet he is against it. Just recently (as in right this moment) he is telling me I have to make a decision whether I get a revision or I stay with him. He keeps telling me that If i want to be with him, I have to sacrifice getting my boobs done again. I don't understand why he can't be supportive, he knows how much I hate my boobs and yet he does not even want to consider my feelings,. This is making me feel extremely sad, I really need some support or advice as I am not sure what I should do. Should I have a breast revision or just try and be happy with my boobs and stay with my boyfriend?

Please tell me if you have been through something similar.

Thank you
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Old 06-06-2016, 06:22 AM
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Does he tell you a reason why he doesn't want you to get the revision? Is it money? Or does he say you're fine the way you are, etc.?

I can't imagine my husband telling me I can't do something that would ultimately build my confidence and self-esteem. Do you see a future with this man? I imagine after 2 years you are pretty steady with him.

This is tough, but you have to do what is going to make you feel the best.
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Old 06-06-2016, 06:29 AM
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Just to confirm: you are 18 now...so you were 16 when you got them done (2014 = 2 years ago)...You've been dating this "man" for 2 years...so you met him shortly after you got your surgery I presume...

No man can "LET" you have surgery. It's your body and your decision.

WHY are you unhappy with your boobs? Complication? Want bigger? Maybe he sees "unnecessary" surgery as too much of a risk...Maybe hes just too controlling...maybe he thinks you'll leave him if you get them bigger...

I will tell you this, anyone who gives you an ultimatum is not worth it. its one thing to say "I dont support you I dont agree with you and you're on your own financially and for recovery"...its another to say "me or the boobs".

He is a boyfriend, not a husband. You are young, plenty of time to meet Mr. Right if you leave Mr. All Wrong...
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Old 06-06-2016, 06:39 AM
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Originally Posted by CFboobies View Post
Just to confirm: you are 18 now...so you were 16 when you got them done (2014 = 2 years ago)...You've been dating this "man" for 2 years...so you met him shortly after you got your surgery I presume...

No man can "LET" you have surgery. It's your body and your decision.

WHY are you unhappy with your boobs? Complication? Want bigger? Maybe he sees "unnecessary" surgery as too much of a risk...Maybe hes just too controlling...maybe he thinks you'll leave him if you get them bigger...

I will tell you this, anyone who gives you an ultimatum is not worth it. its one thing to say "I dont support you I dont agree with you and you're on your own financially and for recovery"...its another to say "me or the boobs".

He is a boyfriend, not a husband. You are young, plenty of time to meet Mr. Right if you leave Mr. All Wrong...
this. ALL OF THIS!! the biggest word in here is "BOYFRIEND". does he financially support you? (i hope not at being 18 and him being just a boyfriend)

again, you are *18*. immediate red flags are all over the place. 18 is too young to be in a relationship with a "man" that is giving that kind of ultimatum.
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Old 06-06-2016, 07:26 AM
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Originally Posted by CFboobies View Post
Just to confirm: you are 18 now...so you were 16 when you got them done (2014 = 2 years ago)...You've been dating this "man" for 2 years...so you met him shortly after you got your surgery I presume...

No man can "LET" you have surgery. It's your body and your decision.

WHY are you unhappy with your boobs? Complication? Want bigger? Maybe he sees "unnecessary" surgery as too much of a risk...Maybe hes just too controlling...maybe he thinks you'll leave him if you get them bigger...

I will tell you this, anyone who gives you an ultimatum is not worth it. its one thing to say "I dont support you I dont agree with you and you're on your own financially and for recovery"...its another to say "me or the boobs".

He is a boyfriend, not a husband. You are young, plenty of time to meet Mr. Right if you leave Mr. All Wrong...
Well said!! Completely agree with all this!!
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Old 06-06-2016, 08:41 AM
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Im with Miss_Kitty,

But must say that reading your signature it seems that you want boob revision because you want bigger size (750 cc) For me I must say that this size is rather big here in Europe, is not usual to see girls with this size, and Im wondering whether your boyfriend thinks that maybe you are too young and this is too much and he thinks he would not find it very aesthetic in you. The limit of what a determined man considered attractive is different, as happens to women.

But the point here is what you really want, and whether what you feel for him is such that you can give up your desired breast, or the latter is more important to you. Nevertheless I think that, if he loves you probably will not leave you but he uses this as a weapon to make pressure and convince you.
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Old 06-06-2016, 10:20 AM
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So much yes to everything these ladies have said above!

If you "choose" him over getting something that you want then it's over, after that he'll think he has full control over anything you do or want to do that he doesn't like, and it's not ok.

I know after being with someone for 2 years it's hard to say f off, but seriously, tell him to get over himself and if HE wants to stay with YOU he needs to get over the fact that you're going to do what you want with your own body, it's not his choice.
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Old 06-06-2016, 03:54 PM
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I understand no boobs are too big here, and wonderful boobs indeed, but why would you want to get 750 cc for petite girl at 18? Seriously? I am with the guy on this one. I assume that you plan to do 750 from your signature, it s all different if you want a revision because of complications.

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Old 06-06-2016, 04:12 PM
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I can understand that after being with someone for so long its hard to make that decision and you think they're worth choosing, etc. BUT on the other hand he shouldn't be telling you what to do with your body. It's 100% not fair of him to say "choose me, or something that you feel self conscious about". Maybe he's afraid of your confidence? Or maybe he just wants to exercise some sort of control over you?

If its what you want to do, I say you should do it. If he can so easily threaten to leave you for wanting to change something about YOUR body, what will he threaten later on? Relationships don't always last, but your happiness with yourself and your body will.

I'm not saying to drop him like he's nothing, but maybe consider having a real talk with him about how you feel and and find what is making him act this way so that maybe you can form some sort of compromise, so you're not stuck with choosing one or the other.
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Old 06-06-2016, 05:23 PM
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Originally Posted by Embria View Post
I understand no boobs are too big here, and wonderful boobs indeed, but why would you want to get 750 cc for petite girl at 18? Seriously? I am with the guy on this one. I assume that you plan to do 750 from your signature, it s all different if you want a revision because of complications.
Everyone carries implants differently and I am not that much taller that the OP. If my surgeon said that I'd need 750 to obtain the look I was after, I wouldn't question my surgeon. I'd do it. It's just a number.

We do not judge one on implant size. Some people would say "200cc?? Seriously? Why? That's a waste of money!" and that would be hurtful to many users on here. It's just not nice to judge one on size preference. Some have said that and it's not very nice at all.

We do not think that small implants are a waste at all, just like we do not think larger implants are inappropriate on someone that's petite. As long as the surgeon does not test the anatomical limits of safety, who are we to judge? Some might look at me and say "why did you only get 350ccs? You're boobs were way bigger when you were pregnant. You should have gone bigger." or "you were way smaller when you were skinnier, why didn't you just get a reduction and a lift?" Personal preference, that's all.

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Old 06-06-2016, 05:49 PM
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Originally Posted by Embria View Post
I understand no boobs are too big here, and wonderful boobs indeed, but why would you want to get 750 cc for petite girl at 18? Seriously? I am with the guy on this one. I assume that you plan to do 750 from your signature, it s all different if you want a revision because of complications.
I'm with Boobitties on this.

I am extremely petite yet I got 800 in one go. They do not look grotesquely huge; I just look 'busty'. They are very much proportionate as I am a CC-swallower.

It's not for you to decide what'd look good on people, or OP's boyfriend for that matter. It's up to OP and OP alone.

800cc might look huge on you, 800cc might not look that big on another lady. It's all about anatomy, and no two bodies are truly the same.


OP: any guy that says "It's that or me" isn't worth your time. Ditch him before he starts trying to control other aspects of your life. You don't have to answer to anyone; he's not your master, and you're sure as hell not his pet.
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Old 06-06-2016, 07:45 PM
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I would choose the boobs... He sounds controlling to me... Nobody should have to deal with that crap
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Old 06-06-2016, 08:32 PM
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I just wanted to say ((Hugs)) to you. It really sucks that you've been put in this position by someone you love and trust. Maybe you guys can get to the root of why he feels so strongly about your revision. I"m not saying that him giving you an ultimatum was the most adult thing to do, but sometimes giving a person the chance to be an adult and talk it out provides clarity to their point of view. It may not change your mind, but at least you'll know why he feels the way he does. At that point you can make a clear decision as to if this relationship is worth more of your time.

It's easy for us to type out "Just leave him!" but when it comes to pulling the trigger it's a tad harder than that.
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Old 06-06-2016, 08:36 PM
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Choose your own happiness.......

Why on earth does he even think he has a say here when it should in fact be your own personal decision making process?
Tell him to exert his will elsewhere sweetie......
He doesn't get to decide......it's YOUR body...... he may not even be in the picture if we were to fast forward.........

If he's inviting you to sacrifice something.....tell him time to start packing.....

xo!!!
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Old 06-06-2016, 08:39 PM
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Originally Posted by Embria View Post
I understand no boobs are too big here, and wonderful boobs indeed, but why would you want to get 750 cc for petite girl at 18? Seriously? I am with the guy on this one. I assume that you plan to do 750 from your signature, it s all different if you want a revision because of complications.

^^^ Ummm......yes, I'm sure she's serious.......she's posing the question ....age shouldn't be a rule-out regarding implant size^^^^


Oh.....and OP.....I have 700/800's on a petite frame...... looooovin' them
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Old 06-06-2016, 08:52 PM
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As most ladies have said , this is your body .... your decision. The only thing I have to say is that I have had a couple of conversations with my boyf about XL implants and he said he wouldn't continue to date me if I got 1600cc (thats the size we were discussing) and I said "really? Over boobs?" And he said "ya, I love your big boobs but I also have limit to what I think is attractive". He did say that if I wanted that look, go for it & never make me choose....... I don't think that that's necessarily being a bad boyf , doesn't mean he is superficial or anything.... its simply NOT what he is attracted to. I personally don't want anything bigger than what I have anyways, super happy with my size!!! (However I can totally understand where he is coming from) If he decided to do steroids and get super huge and muscular .... I also don't think I would stick around for that, because thats not what I am attracted to either. I know love is not skin deep but we change & grow every year and sometimes what we were attracted to changes; and as individuals, what we want for ourselves changes.....

I think the biggest thing is , If you truly love this guy and want both him and the boobs then talk to him about why he is so against it. And as everyone has said, if you want the boobs, he is just not for it and gives you the ultimatum CHOOSE whatever it is that you want, thats all that matters!
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Old 06-07-2016, 01:32 AM
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I lost a husband and a 9 year relationship because I got boobs...and I don't regret a thing. I would do it all again. If he doesn't want to be with you because you have large implants and hat is what you want it is his loss. Please don't let him control what you do with your body. It is your choice and yours alone.
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Old 06-07-2016, 06:38 AM
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Get the BA done and dump him. If he loved you UNCONDITIONALLY, this shouldn't be an issue/ultimatum. Are you kidding me????

Don't ever let a man control you and tell you what the heck to do, ever!
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Old 06-07-2016, 08:56 AM
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Originally Posted by Embria View Post
I understand no boobs are too big here, and wonderful boobs indeed, but why would you want to get 750 cc for petite girl at 18? Seriously? I am with the guy on this one. I assume that you plan to do 750 from your signature, it s all different if you want a revision because of complications.
Ouch. That's harsh. I'm going to put this into perspective...

I am very petite, and was naturally busty when I was 18. Breastfeeding caused me to lose 5 cup sizes and so I got 800cc on my first BA. I measure the EXACT same now as I did back then naturally (40 in.). When I was younger, a lot of people assumed my breasts were enhanced because of (1) their large size on my small frame, and (2) my breast tissue was dense and firm. I remember receiving a ton of judgment from those who thought this "shallow, slutty, vain, [insert stereotypes here]" 18 year old had somehow ruined her life by getting "grotesquely huge implants" (even though I was natural). I also remember multiple individuals (who knew I was all natural) trying to push me into getting a breast reduction. I never understood why everyone thought they had a right to judge me over my body, and a right to offer rude and insulting advice, simply because I was younger than they were! Breast size (whether natural or enhanced) has NOTHING to do with one's character, principles, or behavior. How is a petite 18 year old adult with large breasts somehow an offensive sight? Are big boobs somehow less offensive on someone older and taller? Really??????! Is it somehow less offensive if the girl's boobs are naturally big, as opposed to enhanced and big... Either way they are big, right?!

What does age really have to do with body image anyway? When I was 18, I wanted a bigger butt. Now that I'm 30, I still want a bigger butt. When I was 18, I hated my nose. Now that I'm 30, I still hate my nose. Back when I was 18, I liked my big natural boobs but wanted bigger boobs. Now that I'm 30, I like my big fake boobs but want bigger boobs. See a pattern here? Human maturity really has very little to do with body image. I've changed in SOO many ways since I was 18, but my body image has pretty much stayed the same; I have the same insecurities I did at 18, and my only regret--insofar as plastic surgery is concerned--is that I waited so long to go through with it.

OP: don't let your boyfriend bully you on this. But I won't go so far as to suggest that you ditch him over this either. I'm with CF and Hotpotato here: find out WHY he felt the need to make such an ultimatum... Maybe one of his family members had BA complications? Maybe he got dumped by a girl who upgraded to that size? To me, that is a LOT different than a man who makes the same ultimatum just because he's a controlling jerk.

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Old 06-07-2016, 09:07 AM
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Maybe he feels like by you getting such large implants it will give you a look that may make you appear to other people in a way that would embarrass him. It really might end up being that much of a turn off to him that he won't be able to handle being with you anymore. If it's something you really want then do it and find a man that thinks that look is attractive.

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